For Adults

Information and advice for parents and careers

What is Mental Health?

Mental health includes our emotional, psychological, and social well-being. It affects how we think, feel, and act. It also helps determine how we handle stress, relate to others, and make choices. Mental health is important at every stage of life, from childhood and adolescence through adulthood.

Over the course of your life, if you experience mental health problems, your thinking, mood, and behaviour could be affected. Many factors contribute to mental health problems, including:

Biological factors, such as genes or brain chemistry.
Life experiences, such as trauma or abuse
Family history of mental health problems

Mental wellbeing doesn’t have one set meaning. We might use it to talk about how we feel, how well we’re coping with daily life or what feels possible at the moment.

Good mental wellbeing doesn’t mean you’re always happy or unaffected by your experiences. But poor mental wellbeing can make it more difficult to cope with daily life.

What can you do to help your child?

The best thing you can do is encourage them to talk:

To you
A sibling
A trusted friend
A teacher
Their tutor
Pastoral Support Worker
Doctor

Parents can play a key role in teaching their children how to handle these difficult days

Be a Good Listener

First, you must be a good listener. Allow your child to explain what is wrong without interrupting or putting your spin on the events. Parents may ask questions that allow their child to respond, but they should avoid asking in a demanding manner.

Watch Your Reaction

Your reaction is critical; therefore, make sure you do not overreact to what your child says. For instance, if your child expresses sadness over something trivial, if you dismiss it, you are dismissing your child’s feelings. Additionally, if you react with high emotion, it may cause your child to become more upset. For example, if your child senses your anxiety, it may make your child more upset.

Be Compassionate

Show your compassion by saying things like, “I am sorry you had a bad day” or “I am sorry you are feeling this way.” These comments show your child you have noticed their feelings and you care for them. Again, even if you think the reason for the difficult day is not that big if a deal, it is to your child. Therefore, you should extend some grace.

Show Physical Affection

If appropriate, show physical affection. While you should not force your child to hug or cuddle, some children do respond positively to physical touch when they have had a difficult day. Sometimes a hug from mum or dad is all they need to feel safe and loved.

Make Them Feel Safe

By listening and showing compassion, you are making your child feel safe talking to you. You can also make your child feel safe by sticking to your routine. Instead of allowing a bad day to throw everything off course, try to do what you would normally do. Routine feels safe to children because it allows them to know what to expect. Finally, remind them that they can trust you and that your home is a safe space.

Give Space

After you have checked in, you may need to give your child some space. Some kids need time alone at the end of a difficult day. Others simply need a nap and a snack. You know your child best, so if you sense this is not the time to talk about it in depth, then step back and give him/her some space.

Raising low Self Esteem

Self-esteem is the opinion we have of ourselves.

When we have healthy self-esteem, we tend to feel positive about ourselves and about life in general. It makes us better able to deal with life’s ups and downs.

When our self-esteem is low, we tend to see ourselves and our life in a more negative and critical light. We also feel less able to take on the challenges that life throws at us.

Mindfulness

Paying more attention to the present moment can improve your mental wellbeing. This includes your thoughts and feelings, your body and the world around you.

Some people call this awareness “mindfulness”. Mindfulness can help you enjoy life more and understand yourself better. It can positively change the way you feel about life and how you approach challenges.

Mindfulness is recommended by the National Institute for Health and Care Excellence (NICE) as a way to prevent depression in people who have had 3 or more bouts of depression in the past.

Bedtimes Routines

Teenagers need 8-10 hours of sleep each night.

It’s common for teenagers to start going to bed and waking up later.
Simple habits can help teenagers get the sleep they need for health and wellbeing.
It’s good for teenagers to be involved in solving their own sleep problems.

Teenagers need sleep to:

maintain good physical health
regulate appetite and stay at a healthy weight
maintain energy levels
maintain good mental health, build resilience and reduce stress
learn, concentrate and remember things well
maintain healthy social relationships.

Lack of sleep can make it harder for your child to behave well, regulate emotions, pay attention, do well at school, and get along with others. Being tired all the time can even contribute to mental health issues like anxiety and depression.

Waking, sleeping and napping routines

Keep wake-up times on school days and weekends to within 2 hours of each other. This helps to keep the body clock regular.
Get out of bed when they wake up in the morning, rather than staying in bed.
Spend the hour before lights out avoiding screens and doing relaxing activities like reading, listening to music or having a warm shower.
Keep daytime naps to no more 20 minutes, and make sure the nap is in the early afternoon.

Sleep environment

Avoid the use of electronic devices in the hour before bed.
Put electronic devices in family rooms overnight.
Check their sleep space. A quiet, dimly lit space is important for good sleep.

Good health and nutrition

Have a satisfying evening meal at a reasonable time. Feeling hungry or too full before bed can make it harder to get to sleep.
Get as much natural light as possible during the day, especially in the morning. This will help the body produce melatonin at the right times in the sleep cycle.
Have a healthy breakfast to kick-start their body clock. This helps the body feel ready for sleep at night.
Avoid caffeine – in energy drinks, coffee, tea, chocolate and cola – especially in the late afternoon and evening.
Do some physical activity during the day, but avoid intense exercise in the hour before bed.

Worries, fears and anxiety

Talk about worries with you or another trusted person during the day, especially if worries keep them awake at night.
Write down anxious or sad thoughts well before bedtime. For each thought, add a possible solution.
Try some mindfulness exercises, breathing exercises or relaxation exercises to calm an anxious or active mind before sleep.

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Developing Resilience

All children are capable of working through challenges and coping with stress. Resilience is the ability to bounce back from stress, adversity, failure, challenges, or even trauma. It’s not something that children either have or don’t have; it’s a skill that kids develop as they grow.

Resilient children are more likely to take healthy risks because they don’t fear falling short of expectations. They are curious, brave, and trusting of their instincts. They know their limits and they push themselves to step outside of their comfort zones. This helps them reach for their long-term goals and it helps them solve problems independently.

Stress is what we experience when we sense an immediate threat in our environment. Anxiety is what we experience when our brains wander into the past or future, and we imagine a threat that is not directly in front of us.

In this way, anxiety is harder to figure out than stress. Let’s consider the cycle of anxiety:

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Cognitive Behavioural Therapy

The symptoms of social anxiety: thoughts, feelings, behaviours and physical reactions are all interconnected and affect each other. Cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) works on changing thoughts and behaviours. Since they are interconnected, this can improve all symptoms. The effectiveness of CBT has been demonstrated in over 1000 studies and the method is widely used by psychiatrists to help people with social anxiety.

Cognitive Therapy

The cognitive part aims to question old negative thought patterns, create new more realistic and positive ones, and with training and repetition make the new thought patterns habitual. By altering your thoughts you can also affect your feelings, behaviours, and physical reactions.